the belt carrier think i'm not confident and i think its so optional , i mean i'm so confident when i talk about music , movies , art , moneymaking, computers ...and i'm also confident about my face and what i wear , but i'm not confident about my body , god i hate my fat fuckin body ...

the question is what kind of confident is so attractive for people , the one which is an illusion ?? like waering a fake gucci outfit without knowing it? or the one which is real ?? like wearing a real gucci out fit ?? can people realy understand the diffrence?

i think confidence comes from whitin and thats why wearing a fake gucci outfit whitout knowing it gives u the same confident that waering a real one gives u!!
so if u feel confident about a fake gucci outfit ,can u fake the confidence in ur self for other people to like u?

here i was , in a fast food ,with our lovely lil group , we were having lunch together everything was ok , but i still couldnt express my feelings the way they were , i've been thinking about this for a while , can u express ur feeling whitout caring about the people around u ??? as it goes by i find it harder and harder , everyday , every second.... can we realy live like a jazz trio???

now we r in cafe paeez with the angry old woman with all her "hiss" and "shut ups" but i find it possible to like her the way she is!! so i try the same method for the lil game we play "esmkeshi" but everytime i open the lil white paper i was praying for just one name and nobody else and is that a proof for our weakness ? or its just natural to care for someone so much??
why cant we appriciate everyone equaly? what does it all mean?

then pier pull out this game ,to love the one u pick and express ur feelings to her for 2 min !!
and there she was...i was choking , laughing for no reason , i was shaking, my knees was trembling but i couldnt even look her in the eyes...
if we r so fucked up with cliches and rules that we can not express our feelings to the one we love for only 2 min then whats the point of loving someone anyway??
if its so hard for us to express our anger, hate , desires and love then whats the point of having them??
i was wondering can we express our feelings without following a goal ?